Monday, March 24, 2008

Limits

Just a little clarification :)

I do not impose artificial limits on my kids.

There are natural limits, due to sharing, taking turns, what resources we have available at the time.

This is where talking about respect all of their lives comes in to play. We learn how to share the computer or not to eat the last piece of something without announcing it. It's give and take, I try to make win- win situations when the kids are not getting along.

It's just part of the process of living and learning together.

When a child has say only an hour to use the computer, what if he is in the middle of something? Does a parent say I don't care your time is up? Or do they say, ok how much longer do you need to finish?


I really am not trying to make things so black and white, but when I see what some parents say I do draw these conclusions.

I realize there is lots of middle ground between authoritarian parenting and what I do, I don't even know what to call it :)

There are lots of buzz words: peaceful, mindful, respectful, partnership.
I always called what I did *common sense parenting* but then I realized that so many people don't have common sense.

Right from the start, I carried my baby, I talked to them, shared with them, fed them when they were hungry and they slept when they were tired.

Instead of filling their world with no's and cant's and dont's, I told them what they could do, created an enviornment where they could crawl around and be free to explore.

Unschooling and parenting this way are completely natural for me.

4 comments:

Heather said...

You are so right about that common sense thing!

jewlsntexas said...

It's called awesome parenting!
You rock!
Your kids are SO LUCKY!

Will you be my mom?
Which now sounds ridiculous as I remember that I'm older than you! ha ha!

kelli said...

I was thinking the same things too.. that our children are able to learn their own limits. :)

I hope that I'm helping my kids be the people they truly are meant to be. I try not to impose my self on them, helping them to see their true selves.

It's an amazing life :)

Grace Walker said...

Wow, I really enjoyed this post Stephanie! Very encouraging. You're an awesome mom. :o)