Thursday, March 13, 2008

Hitting is never the answer

We had a small incident tonight where Cassie was messing around and apparantly hit the neighbor boy and he hit her back, no time for her to apologize or say it was an accident or anything.

My husband will not stand for anyone hitting his daughter...EVER! We talked to everyone and got the story and then Jason talked to the boy. He basically said I don't care what she did you do not hit my daughter and you do not hit girls. The boy didn't know what to do, he went outside, walked around, thought a little and cried a bit. He is also spending the night tonight, we left that up to him if he still wanted to. My son told him that *you don't hit girls* my kids whack each other on occasion. Jason has had the talk with them and even though she is your sister you do not hit her and even if she hit you first... We told them that we know she can get out of hand but that they need to come to us and we will talk to her, do not hit her.

Some people may think it's a double standard but you know what I don't think it is. We don't want him or any boy to grow up and hit his girlfriend or his wife. We are also talking to Cassie about not hitting boys or girls or anyone for that matter.

When an adult hits another adult they can be arrested if the person presses charges. Parents have no right to hit their child who can't press charges. You want to talk double standards? Parents hit kids then turn around and tell them not to hit. That is stupid! Do as I say not as I do, I heard that one enough growing up to make me gag...

Spanking is wrong period, no if's and's or but's about it! Hitting is never the answer, we need to model this for our kids and help them deal with frustration and anger that would cause them to hit.

This is an ongoing thing for me as a parent, when my kids whack each other sometimes I just ask them if they want me to do that to them, of course they don't.


Tina said...

Hang in there. I've had this issue at times also. Not so much now that they are a lot older.

justjuls said...

I don't think it is sexist either -- it is a realization that we are created different.
It is good that you still allowed the sleepover - so he knows that he did wrong but has been extended grace.
When kids live in homes where they are hit all the time - they just react. My kids do sometimes - of course we were spanking parents when they were little - but very rarely.
I have learned a lot that I would do differently if I could do it all over.