whine

I am sick and I feel lousy!!!!!

My kids were sick this week and I thought I warded it off but now after taking care of them I got it.

BWHAAHAA!!!!!

To top it off I am very hormonal, I don't know if I'm coming or going, everything is 10 times worse than it really is, KWIM?

I skipped my period last month, I've been using progesterone cream since the 12th day of skipping it. Today I've had slight spotting and cramps and just plain pissed off feeling.

I hate being sick, it's all in my head, LOL! Head cold that is, sore throat, runny nose, headache, run down, oh and add a splash of hot flashes in there.

It's so fun to be me :)

If you read this, thanks for letting me whine, I don't do it that often...

I think I'm going to soak in the hottest water possible with a glass of wine and sweat this virus out.

Dizzy

While I'm getting over that nasty virus now my allergies are full blown and I'm so dizzy.

I don't know how much writing I'll be doing, I want to reply to some emails and blog but I don't know what I'll do.

Thanks to all who sent prayers, well wishes and virtual goodies!

Emerging from Delerium

This post may not make any sense but what's new.

Thank you my friends for the well wishes and prayers.

A few minutes after I posted that I was sick I went to bed for about 45 hours.

The FLU hit me like a freight train and I was delirious with fever, talk about unconscious mutterings, wow. The pain was excruciating and I would not wish the flu on anyone.

Jason brought it home from work, gotta love that.

I think this is the longest internet hiatus since we moved.

I am still really weak and dizzy and sore but at least I am out of that damn bed...

Kieran had it and now Brennan has it and Jared, Cassie has just had a low grade fever and a cough but no freight train.

The last time I had this was almost 4 years ago and before that Kieran was a toddler so thank God this doesn't happen often.

Jason and I were both in bed(sick) on Saturday, we have never both been sick at the same time.

The kids managed pretty well except Jared because only mom can do anything for him. Mom could not get out of bed and he had a hard time dealing with that. I felt bad for him but I could hardly get up to pee and Jason had to help me walk to the bathroom.

So I'll spare you the John Madden version.

We still have a lot of healing to do but thank God we are healing.

I miss you guys :)

Pity Party

I'm sick.

BWHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

Greetings from the sickos...er sickies :)

Where to begin? Well I don't paint beautiful pictures with words like Julie or Laura but I can still be coherent, I think.

I'm not gonna lie it's been a rough week with all the sickness but we still had a great Christmas and we still cooked dinner, roast beef, yummmmmy :) So we didn't frost cookies until yesterday but that was no big deal.

I'm just going to be straight with you guys, I don't even know who reads this besides a handful of people...

I have got some PMS going on, sucks to be sick and extra cranky on top of it. I don't have it as bad as dh, thank God, I have it bad enough though. I have to take care of everyone else and I am run down, I have lost it a few times the past two days. I hate when I lose it because I feel like a loser who can't control herself.

My kids have been bickering, mostly Cassie and Jared and Jared has been pretty sick, he hasn't eaten much and he is coughing and stuffed up BUT he has been unbearable and I have run out of patience. I hate when I get to the end of my patience because then I just bitch, and say things I shouldn't say. I am not proud of this but it happens every month, it just plain SUCKS, hormones SUCK!!!!

I really don't want to be a perfectionist and I didn't think I was one after reading a bit about them. One of my mottos is if I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna do it right. This does not keep me from doing/living but I have also heard people say I'm gonna do it even if it's wrong, I would just never say something like that.

I take parenting very seriously, so when I lose it, I beat myself up, I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy... I apologize to my kids, I apologize to God for losing my temper and screwing up.

I know I'm not perfect but I want to be the best mother I can, I have this image in my mind but when I fall short it is soooo hard to deal... I always tell people to buck up and deal so of course that is the advice my dh gives me :)

The mess is overwhelming and it makes me cranky, dh says get over it would you!!! YES in about a week I'll get over it!!! Why do hormones make everything so much more than it really is???? You have no idea how much I have let go in regards of mess, I used to vacuum everyday, Laura close your eyes you would not handle this well. Now it's like, OK I need to clear this room so I can vacuum the floor, one room at a time.

I can't deny my kids freedom to create and play in every room of the house, what kind of stick in the mud would I be? Oh yeah, I would be me, Miss I wish the house didn't looked lived in, I'm so over that, NOT!

We are who we are, I am me and nothing will change that, I have to adapt and figure out what is important.
I want my kids to learn, grow, explore, play, create and have fun.

At the same time I need something in the house that is clean and uncluttered :)

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all of my blogging buddies!

We are experiencing some viruses here but plan to conquer them, LOL!

Yeah I got it, I was doing so good not getting it, yep, I'm pissed I hate getting sick. It is an invasion of privacy, a personal attack, I hate it, can you tell?!

We are waiting for kids to fall asleep and santa to prevail,we have been watching Norad to check his every move :)

The presents are wrapped, the cookies are baked, not decorated and all is going as well as it can when you get sick :)

I wish you all a Happy Christmas!

Thoughts from the dizzy blonde

Well I'm not blonde now am I Tina? LOL! But I used to be I'll get a picture of me blonde soon.

Dh and I joke about blondes and dizzy and stuff all the time so since I have an inner ear/sinus thing going on I am really dizzy even if I'm a brunette.

I am better than yesterday, my gosh, I was taking a shower and shaving my legs and then I instantly was weak in the arms and legs and I sat down. I started crying, Cassie came in and I was sitting there with soap in my hair and one shaved leg... It was not cool, talk about freakin out, I was shaking so bad...

I have been having dizziness on and off and an ear twinge on and off but I guess it got worse. I am prone to this but it has been awhile, maybe since last winter.

Today I was taking my Xlear nasal spray that dh drove to get after work last night. It is not convenient to buy non medicated treatments, the health food stores are nowhere near us, he didn't get home until almost 7 pm, he is such a good guy :)

I'm off my rocker, today I needed to lay down, pure exhaustion, this is not me, so I know I have a virus. The neighbor kids came over as soon as they got off the bus and guess what their mom is sick, oh joy I don't feel good and I get 6 loud kids instead of 4. Something ain't right here!

I was not myself I told the kids I didn't feel well, my head hurts and I need to lay down...
They were just being loud and goofing and I had to tell them to go outside. I had a little talk about respect with them today.
I realize that there is a huge sense of freedom at my house but you need to respect me :)

I just took a hot bath and had so many thoughts but something about them going down the drain really stinks. I put the hot washcloth on my face and had some wine and just tried to relax.

I also will use my eye pillow when I go to bed, I got it from my friend Penny, I keep it in the freezer.

Here's hoping and praying I'll be better tomorrow!

Summer colds

What an oxymoron, it all started with Tina http://www.caffeinefreedom.blogspot.com
Her family had colds a few weeks ago, I thought it was odd.

It's been over 100 degrees all month you would think that viruses would be dead.

So earlier this week Cassie has a sore throat and stuffy nose, then Kieran, then Brennan, now me and Jared too. I have a sore throat!!!!

Kieran also has three internet friends with it too. This gives new meaning to *computer virus*

No sleep last night because Jared was wimpering because he didn't feel good, then the dogs barked all morning.

Some days I think I would be better off just staying up, sleep is overrated, of course I don't get any.

I hate being sick

I have been sick since Christmas and enough is enough! I should be laying down but I'm sore and I have so much to do but don't have much energy. I feel a little better today considering I have spent the last 2 days in bed for the most part.
I am a terrible sick person, I feel violated, I get cranky and miserable. YUCK!!!!!

My dad and stepmom came down from NY to visit and I tried my best to not act as awful as I felt. We even went to the zoo, it's amazing that I walked through the zoo when I should have been in bed. That is probably why I got worse but I didn't want to ruin it for my kids.

There was a highlight to that, I got to see the elephants :)
Anyone who knows me knows that I love elephants. Oh they were just gorgeous, Jason got some pictures and videotaped them for me. I can't wait to go back and visit them and the kids are looking forward to the next trip to the zoo. It was a great time even if I was feeling lousy.

Now it's time to take down the Christmas decorations and clean the house. I did a little bit so far but I'm just really out of it.

For the past several days I have been pushing the vitamin C, taking Oscillo and Oil of Oregano and trying to rest. I even took some hot baths accompanied with Chardonnay, I was trying to sweat it out or flush it out with alcohol

Oh well I know I'll be better soon it just sucks to be ill.